We all can set goals. I've set more goals than a hunter sets traps. But just because you've made a goal does not mean that you will automatically make it. They hang over our heads like Eeyore's cloud, flustering and worrying us. Eternal shame will be our life if we don't make them.
So how can we save ourselves from this pit of despair we willingly threw ourselves into?
Set Definable Goals
(I can hear everyone groan.)
If your goal is to get outside more, that can be kind of elusive. At the end of the year, how will you be able to know if you met that goal? Getting outside can be achieved by going to check the mailbox or opening the front door to let the cat out, right? Or were you thinking more along the lines of going to a social event every month or going on a couple hikes? With an elusive goal, at the end of the day, you can think "eh, I walked to the car on my way to work, I'm good."
But changing your goal to something clearly set, like walk up the driveway and back every day is easier to remember, easier to strive towards, easier to actually achieve. And if you get into the habit of walking up the driveway every evening, you'll find yourself getting into the habit, and then even dragging it out...maybe you'll stop to talk with a neighbor, or pull those few weeds between the cracks of the steps to the porch. Maybe you'll realize the weather is beautiful, and sit out on the lawn or walk down the road.
If you give yourself a simple, easy goal, it's harder to forget and ignore it.
Set a Lower Paper Goal
Last year, I set a goal to read 50 books. That's what I told my friends I wanted to meet, it's what I wrote down in my bullet journal. I was fairly certain I could reach that goal, even if life threw a few curveballs.
This may sound a bit stupid, but just keep reading, okay?
Set a Higher Actual Goal
My paper goal was 50 books. But actually, I was going to push myself to 70. That was my real goal. And when I reached 80 by the end of November, I decided to push myself to 100.
This year, I did NaNoWriMo. My goal was to write 50K of my new book. That's what NaNo is about, right?? But actually my goal was to reach 100K. I knew I could do 50K. I do 50K all the time. But I was going to push myself and try something harder.
The actual goal may never get announced to the outside world (okay, maybe just to a close friend or two). But it's always in the back of your mind, whenever you look at your paper goals. If you reach your paper goal, you can be excited. You can cross that one off the list. But you still push yourself on towards the higher goal.
Little Steps
This kind of goes with setting definable goals. Publishing my Novel isn't just achieved by one single act. It's comprised of lots of little tiny things, all scattered and completed throughout the year. You write the book. Cross that off. Edit it. Cross that off. Research agents, editors, publishing houses. Pitch it. Sign a book deal. Or maybe you upload to a self-publishing platform. Do the formatting. Check the proof copy. Set the release date.
Instead of making a Publish goal, maybe lay out the steps and see how far you can get. Make a goal to at least get all the way to pitching your novel, and make that the paper goal.
Relax
If you don't reach your goals for good, honest reasons, you have no reason to be ashamed or to feel bad. If you lost a close friend or family member, and stopped running for a month, that's okay. If you needed to save money and couldn't go to the conference or vacation trip, that's okay. If you were so busy with your own writing that you couldn't read all the books, that's okay. That is real life, that is putting the most important things first. You should be proud of yourself for what you did in the time you had.
If you didn't make your goals because you binge-watched a TV series or scrolled through Tumblr instead of reading or writing or running, than you should feel guilty.
Never Give Up
If you got sick and stopped running for two weeks, than perhaps you may not reach your goal of running that marathon. But you can always get back into running and be happy with running a half-marathon instead. Or just run a different marathon next month.
Get as close to reaching your goal as you possibly can. Don't just throw in the towel when it looks like you might not make it. You never know - you may actually reach it in the end if you just keep pushing towards it!
Learn
Setting and reaching goals is good for us. We need to learn self-control, perseverance, hard work. Yes, the world will not end if we don't reach our goal of reading 30 books. But if we learn to say no to YouTube temptations, we will be all the better for it.
In the Real World, sometimes there are deadlines that must be met. Taxes have to be filed on time. Work quotas have to be reached by the expected date. Our jobs, our paychecks, our well-being, may depend on this. And if you've learned how to turn off your phone, throw your shoulders back, and get stuff done, you are already ahead of the game.
